Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
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