she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Randomize
