The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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