i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
just tell him i said nine months
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
