U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
