that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
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