Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize