North Korea, Best Korea!
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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