I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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