Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize
