They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
