woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
why do cheetos always look like penises
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Floor bacon is actually really good
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
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