Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize
