At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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