i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize