I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
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