Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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