Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
