He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
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