Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
