If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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