Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
