you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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