After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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