You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
