Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
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