The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
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