Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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