someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Randomize
