Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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