I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
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