You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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