We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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