8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize