i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
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