Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
