I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
