So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
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