oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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