He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
