Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
