69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
