What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
