You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
