Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
