the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
