YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
