i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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