And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
