They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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